I do feel that my two sons (4 and 9) constantly battle for my attention. This comes out in all kinds of forms like those you mention re your daughter. Mine have settled more when we have and stick to routines of doing such and such with one then such and such with the other and explaining that mum is only one person and can't do everything at once. ( I only have one pair of arms and one head if I had more I'd look like an alien...worked once!)Tricky when they are young but you can explain these things to the older ones. Routine seems calming for mine maybe check and revise yours.
Goodluck

she gets loads of attention and the more she gets the worse she seems to be i have three children she is the oldest and always badly behaved