Hi I am a mother of 3 ~ but this cry out is only about 2 of the 3. I am married to a great guy but I feel that I get no help with the kids when it comes to dissaplining them . My 10 yr old daughter woke us up this morning at 6 am with a tantrum something to do with not staying after school for a meeting with a teacher , but the whole problem wasn't that , she didn't want to ride the bus home by her self, so she made a whole big commotion that lasted an hour ( would have been longer but she had to get on the bus) her trantrums go on and on . I am writting to day to maybe a set of parents out there that are going though the same thing that I am .. My husband doesn't help me with the dissaplining . He can be sitting in the same room and completly tune out whats going on around him. I have to guide him to punish the kids. I get so mad that I have to tell him to punish the one thats being the issue , then it sends us into an arguement.
So if theres any one out there that has the answer for me to have my husband help me when it comes to dissplining the kids I am all ears I am going out of my mind these days

If your husband is tuning out the tantrums he has completely the right idea (and is possibly deaf )Its not easy to do (my 10 year old has tantrums too and I have trouble taking my own advice on this one) but it is the only way I know to successfully get the message through that it is a complete waste of there time behaving like that. Only talk to her about the problem when she is calm.

Do you think maybe as you deal with things your husband thinks theres nothing for him to do? Perhaps taking more of a back seat would inspire him to take more responsibility?

Maybe your husband does not know how to respond to her tantrum, or maybe he is afraid that if he gets involved, he might not be on the same page with you(It happened to us). Talk to him about how he feels when your daughter throwing tantrum and ask him what his approach is if he is the one to discipline her. Regarding your daughter's tantrum, it might be something bothers her making her behave that way. Welcome her to talk about the problem in detail and do not judge her feeling, giving her a ear and show your understanding. Ask her about possible solutions she can come up with the conflict. It will take time. Good luck!