I am hoping someone can help. I dont know what to do. i left my sons father a year ago after he r**ed me and he is now inside! however, my sons behavious is really bad, hitting, biting at nursery, tantrums when out walking and at nursery, not listening or being deaf wheni talk to him ()it is like talking to a brick wall terrible tantrums when we go to my grans house at leaving time and today he started to kick me for no reason while we were there getting ready to go out. i just ignored this like my support worker said but i cannot put up with it anymore. can anyone advise me on how to handle the situation. i love my son more that anythingin the world but sometimes feel i cant be anywhere near him. please help.

hmm, i dont know if i can really be of any help but there was something i wanted to say...

well done for leaving your sons father and getting him locked up, i know its a real scary thing to do and from what i can work out getting evidence for rape within marriage is nigh on impossible!!

how old is your son?

maybe we can work from there.

willow

Yes how old is your son? Makes a difference if he's a toddler or a teenager.

But I would agree with your support worker and ignore the behaviour, this tactic takes time and usually involves the child making more effort to get your attention at first until they are 100% convinced that you will just ignore them every time no matter how far they push you. When they get worse take it a sign there getting the idea and your near the end, give in just once and your back to square one as it proves to them that there efforts will eventually pay off.

And echo what willow has said, well done for getting out, your obviously a strong person so you will get through this phase with your child so hang on in there ok.

dear Willow. many thanks for that. it was a long and drawn out process but worth it in the end. My son is........ 3 (Is there such a thing as terrible 3's?) xx

Is it possible for you to keep track of what happens just before the behaviour occurs, the actual behaviour and your reaction? Do this for a few weeks and you may see a pattern (i.e. he does it when leaving nursery, or he does it after being told 'no, etc).

Feel free to email or call me if you would like to chat more about it.

Kind Regards,
Tana Richards
07951 320 708
www.thebehaviourchangeclinic.com