You don't say exactly what she's doing, but I'm guessing she's rummaging round in her knickers. My daughter used to do the same and I was very very uncomfortable with it, but she just grew out of it. As they get older they become more self-conscious and they have more sense than to do something like this in public! With children of this age it's not ************ in any real sense - just a habit that they find comforting, which is probably why she does it at bedtime. In this sense it's no different from thumb-sucking. Try to play it cool, and if she does it in public just say calmly 'don't do that in front of people' or something like that.
She's not fiddling as such. And according to health visitors she is masterbating and actually getting lots of pleasure from it! Apparantly it quite common among girls but no parenting web sites deal with this issue as they are probaby too embarrassed to feature it.
I have a teacher friend who tells me that many girls opening press themselves on tables etc while in the classroom. I want to nip it in the bud before she gets to school.
