Fiona, Also let me add....I agree with you 100% when you said this...." I am absolutely gobsmacked to read this topic and the numerous replies on this.

What on earth is going on here. I assumed that I had missed something and this young adult was mentally or physically disabled. If she does not have a medical reason for doing this then why are all the adults allowing it. And why are the majority or replies feeling sympathy for the mother? This is craziness and there seems to me to be nothing being done to either stop this child or point the mother in the right direction "

I dont know how the subject/topic changed to something political???

TO be honest Fiona I do think the statement that you made

" I would not go by what Americans do, after all they are the fattest nation, statistically the most unhealthy and not a role model I would use in general for my children to model themselves on. If your child comes home and says can I smoke and take drugs cause they do in America - what do you say? Okay then it myst be alright!!?? I don't think so."

Was totally uncalled for, in response or defense of anything concerning a "healthy" teenage child wearing diapers/having BM's by accident.
I am also American and why it wasn’t enough for me to respond to at first...I must ask in what day dream or imagination, could you possibly think that above statement is valid? Yes we are an overweight nation...but I would bet you couldn’t find 1 "healthy/developmentally normal" teen in the whole country wearing pampers and pooping themselves...and letting their parents change their diapers to boot!
You saying things like blindly following /sheep have something to do with our government....and nothing to do with our opinions on teens in diapers

QUOTE - "Anyway, older children wearing nappies in the States is probably more socially acceptable than it is here." copied from f"rustrated mom" Feb 2nd.

I DID NOT mention Americans letting their childreN/teens wear nappies past the normal time - I only responded in a way I thought would be construed as - okay so someone else does it - so what - that doesnt make it right.

I've had it with this topic - its crazy that you try to offer advice and shine a light for someone who is blinded by what is happening to them. I feel sorry for the ones who defend this kind of behaviour or challenge someone trying to help by getting political. Maybe you should all go back and re-read what I did say and what I was responding to. God knows I can sleep at night!!

Good luck to the mums that want help with a problem and can accept a bit of constructive criticism in a positive manner. Is that what this site is about or is it lets attack the one who speaks the truth?

Fiona

I have a very happy and healthy daughter. She is an A student, she has tons of friends. She's never depressed, she's not rattling on about boys, she's not having sex, she's not doing drugs, and she's not drinking. Yes, she wore diapers until she was 14, yes she wore Pull Ups until she was 15. Just because society says a child needs to be out of diapers before their third birthday I'm being attacked here. I think some of you don't even believe me. I have plenty of pictures in my photo album to prove I'm telling the truth. And don't anyone dare scream abuse, they are family photos, most are taken with family or friends.

Jackie
If by chance you were suggesting that your daughters had an inability to control her bowl, and it was a private matter I could understand that completely, but even then it would be a secret so to speak.. to suggest that she was ok with a younger brother change her, with you changing her in the mall.(doesnt matter if it was 1 time or 50 times). to be put up on diaper changing stations, its far fetched, thats like telling us there is a teen in the world who lets her mother change her sanatary napkins .....common now. No one is judging you as much as being honest about the situation you describe.

If she is an A student and she is normal in all other ways, there is obviously a problem with her body when it comes to bodily matters...and its not a simple case of accidents I still think you are having a go at us!

Having a go? Fine, as you can see from the other post I made, I don't feel comfortable having a picture of my daughter on the internet. But I'll take a chance for now, and delete it after you see it, and I prove to you that I am telling the truth.
My daughter had me take a picture of her and her best friend at a sleepover two weeks ago with her cell phone. My daughter is on the left, it's right before bed so she's wearing her Pull Ups.
http://i43.photobucket.com/albums/e361/Jackie4321/Pic1.jpg

Very brave of you Jackie,

If your daughter needs continence support then I think it is very strong and generous of you to provide it.

The manufacturers make larger sized nappies/diapers, pull-ups, goodnites, pad & pant systems and other absorbent solutions for people from newborn to and including adults because their is a need for it (making a market for it.)

Humans aren't naturally designed to wear nappies, we have them for those who need them to make our lives easier and cleaner, unless any of you prudes have some instructions from your god about it or some obsure law banning it that you would like to share with us all?

Any family that has gone through having a teen on alcohol/drugs, running wild with hoodlums or following their hormones to awkward positions I am positive would definately swap the experience for a happy well adjusted child and a few extra years of nappy changing.

If anyone wants to put an age limit on nappies then shouldn't you be age limiting the need for milk as well?

I dont know about and age limit, but 16yrs is past it! As far as in-continence is concerned, that is a medical problem which Jackie has clearly stated her child doesnt have....as for teens who run wild smoking and the such...could you imagine one of them sprawled out in the mall...while mum changes their bum? at 13? powder too?

Ah well I wish Jackie and daughter the best for the future and was just amazed that anyone could be offended/concerned about someone elses child being dependant on nappies whatever the age.

http://i43.photobucket.com/albums/e361/Jackie4321/Pic1.jpg

Look at the picture I posted again. Does my daughter look unhappy? She's 16 right there. Wearing Pull Ups. I have pictures of when she was younger and wearing full out diapers if you would like to see those too.

She's happy, she always has been. Does it matter that she wore diapers longer than most? Would you be that upset if you did see a 13 year old getting their bum wiped and powdered and diapered would you be that upset? Would you go say something to the parent?

I honestly can't see the harm in it and I do think it makes you a much kinder and more open parent to go through the act of changing nappies for the extra years.

While a huggies ad was on the tv the other day the 8 year old at home even said it would be cool to wear nappies again, so I don't think it's that uncommon for kids to want that extra bit of hands on attention.

Put your photos up and see what people say.

You lot are absolutely mad and need a parenting course - what about helping them to grow up to be responsible and with feelings of importance, this is not the way to ensure your kids feel loved - its undervaluing their self-worth. You lot think its cool to 'baby' your kids - your off your heads!!! They will not be proud of this when theyre older.

Have some self respect and stop this stupidity - both the actions and the posting and bragging that its okay

IT IS NOT

In your opinion Fiona

I agree that this is a bad situation for all involved (the parents & the children). BUT must you always be SO NICE, Fiona?

Don't get me wrong folks, I am not belittling the parents/others in this who genuinely have a problem. Far from it - I think they need help.

What I am so frustrated at is the way that it is being discussed on here like its okay. It may be okay for them to do it their way - but do it in private and dont expect acceptance from others cause you more than likely wont get it. What is happening is odd, no 2 ways about it. Most people will think it is odd for a teenager to be in nappies and changed in public. More people will think it strange for the parents to think that its okay to do it. Probably all parents will not change places with there parents even if a pile of money was offered in exchange.

I just feel its sad that parents can post their daughters piccy on here in nappies for all and sundry to see - what if their daughters friends use the board! Will they be proud of it when they are getting married - will they tell their husband - I don't think so.

Okay so if it works for you - fine- but keep it private.

"Most people will think it is odd for a teenager to be in nappies and changed in public. More people will think it strange for the parents to think that its okay to do it."

At one time people thought it wrong for women to have a say, people not of the majority ethnic background to have a vote and people with disabilities to be seen in public. Thankfully things have changed.

Personally I think it's society (yourself included) that needs to have a bit of acceptance for things that are outside the normal comfort zone especially since these things can't really hurt.

If Jackies daughters future partner doesn't like the idea that she needed/used/uses continance protection then I would say both of them would need to think about what they love and like about each other rather than worrying about what someone else might think.

I don't know why some people get so worked up over this. It's just a diaper. What is the difference between seeing a 2 year old girl getting her diaper changed and a 14 year old getting her diaper changed?
Is it really that bad that she didn't start potty training until she was 15? Is it so horrible I had a 15 year old wearing Pull Ups, reminding when to go potty, and changing when she had an accident? I mean, hey, she's 16 now, still has accidents. She wears special cotten panties during the day incase she has a small accident, and at bed time, she still wears Pull Ups. I still change her in the morning too.
Is the world coming to an end because of this? I don't think so. I think some people are getting worked up over nothing though.

Jackie, is there a reason why she can't change herself in the morning? I don't think anyone has a problem with a teenager having continence problems, I think it is you changing her that people find unusual. My 11 year old isn't incontinent, but does have periods, she sorts herself out. I don't touch her sanitary towels and she wouldn't want me to do that. I think encouraging our children to develop independence is an important part of parenting and my daughter taking care of matters like this is an important part of growing up. I understand that children develop at different rates but at 16 very few children couldn't take a pair of pull-ups off and shower themselves. It is part of growing up that children begin to want to have their own privacy. Of course I used to bathe and wash my daughter and now she does it herself. She would hate the idea of people seeing her half naked if I changed her in a shopping mall. If your daughter needs pull-ups at night... fine ... that's not an issue to me. But surely an intelligent A grade student that your daughter appears to be can manage to change herself?