sounds like the terrible two's to me. I would suggest that you (pick your battles so to speak)I would let her wear the shoes if its going to cut down on her chaos, I mean if it doesnt really matter if shes wearing them or not, I would even let her wear them to bed if she wanted.
It seems to kids this age if its not a big deal to us (parents) then its not a big deal to them.
My sister is a big fan of the time charts, I dont know how effective they can be for a 2 YR. Old but try making a time chart that shows when you can play with her and when you cant, for example during cooking time and dinner time make up some icons that show what your doing and fun icons that represent when you can have play time... so she can see/learn when its your time and when its share time? I dunno good luck

Given that you are desperate the only thing I can suggest is to have a look at her diet. This is a great website www.fedupwithfoodadditives.info if you want to look into dietary aspects. It might help as preservatives can exaggerate bad behaviour. A lot of parents have seen big improvements in behaviour by changing diet, I am one of them. In Australia there is a particularly bad preservative called 282 which prevents mould. I cut this out of my daughters diet with great results.

Give it a try it can't hurt but don't expect any changes for at least a week. Good luck