i am at my wits end please can someone give some advice! my daughter is nearly 5 years and is being quite naughty in school, it is getting gradually worse and has said to another little girl "I'm not plating with you because you are black" we are a very open family and there has never been anything that has happend like this before! please can someone help me!!!!!
Hi, it is unlikely that her age your daughter is knowingly being racist. I would suggest you simply tell her that it was not a very nice thing to say and that the colour of this little girls skin does not mean she is different inside. Ask her to look at the colour of her friends eyes and suggest she would not like it if someone had told her she could not play with them simply because her eyes were not the right colour. As far as her other behaviour is concerned, start a reward chart and discuss it with the teacher and your daughter, so that if she is predominantly good through the day she can have a small reward at home time (a comic, piece of fruit etc.) which can build up to something more substantial by the end of the week if she keeps it up (perhaps a friend round for tea the next week) DO NOT LET HER HAVE HER TREAT IT IF SHE HAS NOT KEPT HER SIDE OF THE BARGAIN.
thank you so much and i will definatly give it a go, it is just so hard to know what the right thing is to do, once again thank you
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Replying to:
Hi, it is unlikely that her age your daughter is knowingly being racist. I would suggest you simply tell her that it was not a very nice thing to say and that the colour of this little girls skin does not mean she is different inside. Ask her to look at the colour of her friends eyes and suggest she would not like it if someone had told her she could not play with them simply because her eyes were not the right colour. As far as her other behaviour is concerned, start a reward chart and discuss it with the teacher and your daughter, so that if she is predominantly good through the day she can have a small reward at home time (a comic, piece of fruit etc.) which can build up to something more substantial by the end of the week if she keeps it up (perhaps a friend round for tea the next week) DO NOT LET HER HAVE HER TREAT IT IF SHE HAS NOT KEPT HER SIDE OF THE BARGAIN.
Hello Annette,
I read your message on your 5 year old daughter. My first question is, is she your first daughter or do you have other children older or younger than her? The first thing I would do is go to the school and see what is going on there, because there is definitely something bothering her at school for her to carry on like that, she has probably seen or heard something which she, as the child she is, is not aware of and that is making her react. Another question I would ask is whether she behaves like that at home or is it only at school? If it is only at school, there is definitely something bothering her there, either a school friend or a teacher who isn't up to par and whom she feels is not treating her right. Whatever it is, a child doesn't react like that out of the blue, there is something that is making her angry and insecure on the inside.
