My new partner has a 5 year old son, and he is still amicable with his ex partner. They split up 1 year ago.
My problem being is they occassionally see one another as a 'family' just brief spells i.e going for dinner together or playing in the park. I feel this is confusing his son who is is still strugging with the concept that 'Mummy and Daddy' don't live together, but see one another and seem happy. I am trying to figure out whether cutting the contact to minimum (when they hand over the child) or do you think it is good for Tom to see his mum and Dad like this still? Any help or anyone who has been through this would be very welcome.

I have a partner with a 2 1/2 year old in a similar situation. My sense (and I ma no expert) is that an occasional family dinner is a good thing and should not confuse the child. At 5 yo he really doesn't get the nuances of how people could or should be when they are no longer married. He doesn't know that often parents do not interact, he will know wht he sees. I think it is important for him to see you and your partner together as the son needs to see his parents having loving relationships...accordingly it would be best for him to see his parents getting along, sharing what they do have in common, and that if of course HIM!" This would be a challenge for me as I am sure it would be for many, but I would work at it for my partners and his sons sake. I also think it would be even better is sometimes the "family" get togethers would include YOU!