The best way to teach a child that no means no is to stick to it no matter how much they go on. 7 times of asking is lightweight and yes you will have months of it before the penny drops but it will drop.

Give him fair warnings tell him no, tell him why its a no and if he continues asking warn him that the next time you'll do 'insert your own consequence here' Make it something gentle, he doesn't need punishing for it you just want him to get the idea. Never ever back down or you'll go back to square one.


The trouble with shouting is that although its effective in the short term but you'll still be shouting at him when he's 20.

Same with the sleeping, if you want him to sleep in his own bed then your going to have to put a new routine into action and be persistant and let him know that no matter how much he objects you've decided thats how things are going to be from now on and thats the end of it.

I would also like to add that constantly buying things for him is not going to help him learn that he sometimes can't have things, cut back and spend your money on getting out as a family instead. It's a bit unfair to lavish him with presents and then smack him for not accepting he can't have something.

yes to be fair we have just done things for an easy life but it has now backfired. we have no routines and it is our thought - we do spend lots of time doing things as a family, we have a caravan and go away most weekends, my hubby goes out for bike rides with him, to be honest we usually do what he wants to do most of the time. I have tried to spend time with him one to one on a afternoon playing games etc but then he starts being naughty and I end up losing my patience with him. Today he was caught trying to cut a little girls hand with a plastic toy knife and when asked by staff if he knew what he'd done wrong he did not know..with the sleeping thing i know it will be hard because we both work but it has to be done and yes I do need to stick to my guns when i say no.. but my child also starts hitting and kicking me. I really am unsure where to go from here but something needs to change!

Have you done any reading or parenting classes? Parenting is not easy. It is worth puttimg time and effort into study of the subject. My favorite book is Raising Our Children, Raising Oursevles which you can buy on amazon. It is about how to have your child behave well because he wants to, not because you yell.

Also, based on that book, I think routine is not needed and sleeping with you is actually wonderful for him.
Just learning parenting skills for times that are not as simple.

thanks for the tip and i will definately look up the book ! No I have not been on any parenting classes but think it is definately something i need to look into. For all our sakes!!!! Too be honest i don't mind him sleeping with us and most nights i don't really hear him come in but my husband does and it is easier for us as we both work.