MY 9 YO SON WAS PLAYING TRUTH OR DARE WITH A 7 YO NEIGHBOR BOY DURING A SLEEP OVER. ACCORDING TO THE NEIGHBOR'S SON THE DARES BECAME PERVERSE AND CONSISTED OF LICKING PERSONAL AREAS. IS THIS NORMAL CURIOSITY AND I JUST NEED TO HAVE A SERIOUS MORAL TALK WITH HIM. I FEEL 9 GOING ON 10 IS TOO OLD FOR THIS KIND OF CURIOSITY?!
I would agree that while some level of curiosity is very normal, this particular brand of curiosity **that invades others' personal boundaries** is CROSSING THE LINE FOR HIS AGE.
4,5,6 year olds, maybe even 7, do not yet realize that their actions can affect other people beyond "hitting hurts, don't do it" etc. They have trouble remembering that others don't feel or think the way that they do.
A 9yr old on the other hand, has a clear understanding of personal differences and that there are some things we just don't do around other people... more importantly WHY we don't. While it's not set in stone or anything, these concepts are clear enough that your son likely knew he was pushing well beyond reasonable limits. Maybe he liked the feeling of power playing truth or dare with a younger friend (unlikely to object or even stand up for himself) and just got carried away. But he needs to have it asserted to him that that was WAY over the line and is not to be repeated under any circumstances.
I would also have another apologetic talk with the younger boy's parents (the boy himself is probably pretty embarrassed about the whole thing) encouraging them to teach him to stand up for himself and not do anything for anybody that he is not comfortable with. Your son should have known better but this younger boy needs to grow a spine for his own personal safety.
thanks for posting that link, a very interesting artical, very worrying too. It would have helped if you added to your post the subject of the link; some people, including myself are reluctant to visit pages without knowing what the content is. So many people use forums like this one to post links to dodgy sites.
