My son now 2.5yrs still has his 'dody' for bedtime. He does ask for it during the day especially when he's tired and Daddy and I sometimes give in to stop his whinning! He sometimes wakes in the early hours asking for his 'dody' and we take it in turns to sort him out -this means that we have to get on our hands and knees looking for the darn thing! Should I be weaning it of him completely now or should I let him continue? Would appreciate some advice. Do you think he will ever wean himself of it or will I have to do it? Am worried that any future girlfriends may think it odd that he has a dummy to help him sleep!

Hi Amanda,

LOL girlfriends might also still have dummies! When I first met my hubby I laughed my head off when I saw he still sucked his thumb in his sleep!!

My eldest son had his until he was nearly 4 *blush*. By that time he wasn't as attached to it, and we talked about nursery and how the bigger children wouldn't have dummies, and that he couldn't take it to nursery. There were no tears, he just sort of outgrew it. I was worried about his teeth being crooked, but he has very straight symmetrical teeth.

My youngest, sadly, woudln't have a dummy, he wanted his thumb. I say sadly because, now he is 6, and still sucks his thumbs at night and when hes upset, and he has an awful overbite. So, I favour the dummy, simply because you can take it away.

What would he do if you accidentally lost the dummy? Or maybe you could look at tv characters he likes and discuss whether he thinks they might have had one when they were only small, and that now they don't need them, and so on. Sounds silly, but sometimes kids relate to their fave characters better than adults!

Good luck with whatever you decide!

Love Liz x

Hi Amanda!

I wasn't allowed a dummy when I was small, and (gosh this is a bit embarrassing...!) I kind of resented that as I grew up. I know that sounds really odd, but I had a very insecure childhood.

So (more embarrassment) I started sucking my thumb when I left home at 15 - kind of a rebellion thing I think. I even wanted to go and buy myself a dummy but I didn't. Luckily the phase passed quite quickly.

Anyway, onto more relevant things! I believe Liz is spot on - the research definitely suggests that thumb or finger sucking is more likely to result in tooth problems than dummy sucking, as Liz says because the dummy is likely to be used less often/is less accessible and also because of the physical nature of a dummy.

Apparently a flat dummy puts less pressure on the teeth than a round one.

If you're minimising the use of a dummy during the day then the amount of sucking it gets, mainly when he's falling asleep, is not likely to cause much harm, especially while he has his milk teeth.

I would say you have until the age of 3 AT LEAST and probably 4 before you need to concern yourself, so why not use Liz's gentle suggestions to very gradually help him grow out of it, but don't try to rush him and try not to worry!

Interestingly, there have been some recent studies that suggest that use of a dummy is associated with lower risk of SIDS, although no-one seems to know why yet. For anyone interested in this, here is a link to some abstracts: dummies and SIDS studies

cyberhugs,

Cassie

Parenting support from Monicka and Cassie at www.kidsgoals.com.

Self esteem building and goal setting for kids. Parenting tips and resources, educational games, kids crafts and learning activities.

I sucked my thumb till I was 15 (so also embarrassed ) and my top teeth were pulled forward, the bottom ones pushed back AND I'm sure my smoking is my substitute for it now.

So keep the dummy if he still needs it to get to sleep, just leave a supply where he can get to them easily when he loses one.

One word of warning about dummy clips...my son managed to attach his to the corner of his blanket and I found him in his cot with it wrapped around his neck one night, it was on VERY FIRMLY and took a serious pull to get it off, if he'd rolled over it would have strangled him, so not the innocent things they are supposed to be.

"I sucked my thumb till I was 15 (so also embarrassed ) and my top teeth were pulled forward, the bottom ones pushed back AND I'm sure my smoking is my substitute for it now." MY fingers warped too as a result.

Haha! Me too Ellie! I used to suck my fingers though.

When we decided that the dummy was to be done away with, we waited for their Christmas(3rd). The deal was that they swapped the dummies with Santa for their presents... worked charm

Good luck

Hi Amanda, Both my daughters had dummies and at about 2 1/2 years old coming up to nursery I decided that they should stop having their dummies, My oldest daughter gave hers to the easter bunny in exchange for chocolate eggs ! and my youngest gave me hers on xmas eve for father xmas to take, and they never asked for them after that, Don't know if it will work for you but also when my cousin was little her teeth started to deform because of the shape of the dummy
Best of luck
Joanne

Hi Amanda,

Both of my kids had dummies until they were 4. It was on their 4th birthday that we agreed there would be no more dummies. Although for both I tried to limit the dummy to nighttimes..or emergencies. Both have nice teeth.....and I am sure I saved myself a lot of whining.

But did spend a lot of time on my knees searching for dummies....and a fortune on buying them.



Good luck

Lina