Call me crazy, or a horrible mother, which ever, but please help! My son is 4, he will be 5 in april. He went to Alabama with my mom Tuesday to visit my aunt. He came back last night and today he is going nuts lol. He got mad at me because I put him in timeout, cause he changed to tv when I told him not to, part of it is he is tired. Well, he got this idea he was gonna pack up and move in with my mom haha. So he packed up, put all his stuff by the door and we called my mom. I told my mom to play along, which she did not but all is well anyway, she told him no, that he would have rules at her house to. He said things like he does not like me and that he can not forgive me, gees, the pain of children!! Earlier he got a spanking, his brother to cause they were fighting. I dunno, I know it’s a kid thing, kids at vista did stuff like this all the time. I just feel there is a gap in our relationship. He is comfortable enough to tell me how he feels, and I allow him to express whatever it is that he is feeling at the time, then we process, sometimes to soon for my benefit. Last night they were puppies with colars and names, thank God they did not want me to feed them out of bowls on the floor. I don’t know, I want so badly not to become my mother, I want my kids to love me, not grow up with resentment and hate. I want them to look back on their childhood with happy memories. Haha, he just came in here and hugged me and said he loved me! lol, kids, I said ok great so you like me now, lol, he said no! anywho, I just want to be the best I can, and im still a baby and all this makes me feel like a real crappy mother. S.O.S encouragement please, tell me you have been here and done this!

LOL oh yes, have had the I hate you mummy routine a lot and its perfectly NORMAL!!!
A 4 year old saying I hate you mum roughly translates as:

right now I want my own way and if I really kick where it hurts I stand a better chance of you backing down and getting it.


'I want so badly not to become my mother'


I know that feeling but its enevitable that some parts of us will be just like our parents, the thing to remember is that no matter what we think of the way they did things its impossible for all but most god awful parents to get everything wrong all the time (and vice versa annoyingly perfect parents being the opposite of the god awful ones ) so sounding like our own parents sometimes isn't THAT bad...bit scarey though waking up one morning and finding out that parts of you are just like the people you swore you'd never be like though! Feeling guilty about it will do more harm than repeating some of the things your parents did.

Don't take this the wrong way but I was so happy to hear about your day! I thought I was the only one! My 4yr old son tells me on a weekly basis that he's moving to my mum's house - and like you and hour or so later he wants a cuddle and says he loves me, I even get the same 'no' response when I point out that he's changed his feelings...don't really have any advice to give, I usually just go along with the flow when he says it - seems to be a 4yr old thing as it's only been the last few months he's been pulling this stunt. I wouldn't let him watch and older kid's cartoon the other day and he proceeded to pick up his play phone and call the police on me LoL Hang in there and try to laugh it off - it's what I'm doing to try and survive this year with him