Hi, new to this but at the end of my tether right now and don't know what else to do.
I have 3 boys (15,13 &8) My eldest is the problem. He has been steadily getting worse with his behaviour and I feel like I have run out of solutions and consequences.
Since June in particular he has been excluded from school for 4 days for swearing at teachers, graffittied the walls at the local shop (I am surprised we haven't had a visit from the police), got incredibly drunk, come home stoned on a few occassions and has now been fighting in the street with another boy.
My husband and I have grounded him, reasoned with him, yelled at him, stopped pocket money, removed priviledges (mobile phone, t.v, stereo etc etc)and are just at the stage where we don't know what else to do with him.
It feels like he has absolutly no respect for us or anyone at school and no ambitions etc for the future.
Everytime we ry to punish him in any way he threatens to ring social servicesbecause he knows his rights and we can't treat him like we do, but each time we give him back some trust he does something a bit worse. I feel he is on the slippery path to no where and don't know how to turn things around.
Any suggestions would be welcome.

DON'T MESS WITH MOM

My son came home from school one day,

With a smirk upon his face.

He decided he was smart enough,

To put me in my place.



Guess what I learned in Civics Two,

that's taught by Mr. Wright?

It's all about the laws today,

The "Children's Bill of Rights."



It says I need not clean my room,

Don't have to cut my hair.

No one can tell me what to think,

Or speak, or what to wear.



I have freedom from religion,

And regardless what you say,

I don't have to bow my head,

And I sure don't have to pray.



I can wear earrings if I want,

And pierce my tongue & nose.

I can read & watch just what I like,

Get tattoos from head to toe.



And if you ever spank me,

I'll charge you with a crime.

I'll back up all my charges,

With the marks on my behind.



Don't you ever touch me,

My body's only for my use,

Not for your hugs and kisses,

that's just more child abuse.



Don't preach about your morals,

Like your Mama did to you.

That's nothing more than mind control,

And it's illegal too!



Mom, I have these children's rights,

So you can't influence me,

Or I'll call Children's Services Division,

Better known as C.S .D.



Of course my first instinct was

To toss him out the door.

But the chance to teach him a lesson

Made me think a little more.



I mulled it over carefully,

I couldn't let this go.

A smile crept upon my face,

he's messing with a pro.



Next day I took him shopping

At the local Goodwill Store.

I told him, "Pick out all you want,

there's shirts & pants galore.



I've called and checked with C.S.D.

Who said they didn't care

If I bought you K-Mart shoes

Instead of those Nike Airs.



I've canceled that appointment

To take your driver 'S test.

The C.S.D. Is unconcerned

So I'll decide what 'S best.



I said "No time to stop and eat,

Or pick up stuff to munch.

And tomorrow you can start to learn

To make your own sack lunch.



Just save the raging appetite,

And wait till dinner time.

We're having liver and onions,

a favorite dish of mine.



He asked "Can I please rent a movie,

To watch on my VCR?

"Sorry, but I sold your TV,

For new tires on my car.



I also rented out your room,

You'll take the couch instead.

The C.S.D. Requires

Just a roof over your head.



Your clothing won't be trendy now,

I'll choose what we eat.

That allowance that you used to get,

Will buy me something neat.



I'm selling off your jet ski,

Dirt-bike & roller blades.

Check out the "Parents Bill of Rights,"

It's in effect today!



Hey hot shot, are you crying,

Why are you on your knees?

Are you asking God to help you out,

Instead of C.S.D..?

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

Replying to:

Hi, new to this but at the end of my tether right now and don't know what else to do.
I have 3 boys (15,13 & My eldest is the problem. He has been steadily getting worse with his behaviour and I feel like I have run out of solutions and consequences.
Since June in particular he has been excluded from school for 4 days for swearing at teachers, graffittied the walls at the local shop (I am surprised we haven't had a visit from the police), got incredibly drunk, come home stoned on a few occassions and has now been fighting in the street with another boy.
My husband and I have grounded him, reasoned with him, yelled at him, stopped pocket money, removed priviledges (mobile phone, t.v, stereo etc etc)and are just at the stage where we don't know what else to do with him.
It feels like he has absolutly no respect for us or anyone at school and no ambitions etc for the future.
Everytime we ry to punish him in any way he threatens to ring social servicesbecause he knows his rights and we can't treat him like we do, but each time we give him back some trust he does something a bit worse. I feel he is on the slippery path to no where and don't know how to turn things around.
Any suggestions would be welcome.