Hi Tim,

No, I do not advise this if you want your child to flourish and have a secure platform for growth. Unless of course, you go to the school and ask them to remove the detention because it is unjust when you feel it is - I mean the principle would have to go both ways? Have you ever seen a movie called the Winslow Boy? Schools and teachers are far from perfect in their assessment of children and their state of mind I have found. Sometimes they care more about the reputation of the school than the child.

As a general rule, I think that in the world there is probably no shortage of people making demands on children in one way or another, yet a big shortage of parents who are willing to go the distance to find out why their children are unhappy. This is changing thank God as even government realises the importance of the quality of the psychological envbironment in which our children are raised.

On average, little children get about 2000 compliance requests a day. They do well to survive at all. I just wrote a free newsletter about all this. So if you want to know more please email me at david@childproblem.co.uk or check out the web site of the same name. I am not a blind 'liberal' but I do go for what works.

Best wishes

David

I would - because we believe that a child is responsible for their behavior - that they have choices, and if they choose to break a rule at school, they know that the home rule is "do not break school rules". Fair or not - as some may say but in life sometimes its does not seem fair for one but seems very fair to another person. Anyway, from our family standpoint - if you break a school rule, you can count on having a consequence at home as well. A child should be responsible for their own behavior.

mmm i would not! they have been punished already, talk about it with your child but let it end there! that's my advice like the majority suggests i think you will find!

At our home we have consequences for breaking school rules. If you get in trouble at school for not following the rules you will have a consequence at home. If the problem at school was bad enough that they had to go to the principal and he had to call me at work then there is deffinatly a problem that we need to address and take care of, i dont want my children being terrors at school and being labelled as trouble. so to prevent that i deffinatly agree that there should be a consequence at home and to let them know that i expect them to behave at school just like i do at home.