Major issues with girlfriends teenage kids...MAJOR
I hope somebody can help in this situation. I am at my wits end.
First some background info. I have been living with my girlfriend for about a year now. She has 2 kids still in the house and one that is out that is 18. She is a single mom and gets about zero help for the kids' dad as far as visitation. He sees them about once a month if that.
First is the 14 year old boy. He is currently a runaway. He has run away 3 times in the last 2 months, has been to 3 different high schools in 2 months and is currently not going to school. He is well taken care of at home, but when he ditches school on a Wednesday and then asks his mom if he can go to the movies on Friday, she will say "no, because you ditched school". Well then he leaves before she can get home from work. This was last week and we have not seen or heard from him since. We have been in touch with every law enforcement official and the fact of the matter is that running away is not a crime and not going to school is not a crime so the police have very little interest. What holds kids accountable from running away when they do not get their way? He has no credits in high school thus far and is running with the wrong crowd. If there are no legal consequences and if mom cannot enforce any consequences at home, what is stopping him from leaving whenever he does not get his way???? Counseling has been tried, he will not talk. He does not value school and just wants to hang out with friends. It is as if when he IS at home that she babys him so he will not run away, but when she does lay down a MINOR consequence, he runs. It is his way or no way...period!
The 12 year old is watching all this unfold and has gone from an "A" and "B" student to a failure in school. He does not do anything around the house and does not do homework. Today he was suspended from school for 3 days for taking a lighter to school. I do not see anything getting better in the household.
I am at my wits end as far as what to do to help. The way that juveniles can avoid any legal consequences is a JOKE. We have tried looking for programs, but the ones that force the kid to stay in them are court ordered and the kid "has to commit a crime to be in them" according to the police.
Re: Major issues with girlfriends teenage kids...MAJOR
It's not a good choice but you could ask the courts to issue an order stating he is "out of control" and send him to what used to be called "reform school". He won't like it and no doubt you won't like it either, but it may stop the activity and put him back into the main stream of life....
