Our son is fighting with his best friend at school. The problems seems to be that they both start pushing, name calling etc, etc and our son then walks away (as we have advised him to). The trouble is his friend follows and continues the confrontation and our son gets angry and lashes out by spitting or at worst by hitting (he was in trouble twice at school last week for this). I realise that his friend following him is the catalist for his behaviour but wondered if anyone had any tips I could give him to try and keep calm and not lash out? Thanks in advance.

MY SON USED TO BE THE SAME WAY. I ASSUME ALOT OF CHILDREN ARE LIKE THIS SINCE HIS SCHOOL IMPLEMENTED A COURSE ON ANGER MANAGEMENT AND THIS WAS IN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL. SIT HIM DOWN AND TALK W/ HIM GIVE HIM SCENARIOS BY FLIPPING THE SCRIPT SO HE CAN UNDERSTAND HOW IT WOULD FEEL AND ALSO TRY TO GET HIM TO REMEMBER HOW HE FEELS WHEN HE IS GETTING ANGRY. WE ALL HAVE PHYSICAL SIGNS THAT WARN US BEFORE HAND.(I.e. HEART PALPITATES, BALLING OUR FISTS, HEART RACING) THINGS OF THAT NATURE. THAT WAY WHEN HE NOTICES THESE SIGNS IT WILL ALERT HIM HE'S GETTING ANGRY AND GIVE HIM TECHNIQUES TO CALM HIMSELF DOWN BEFORE IT GETS OUT OF HAND.(I.E. WALK AWAY, TAKE DEEP BREATHS, UNBALL YOUR FISTS, COUNT TO TEN) I'M SURE YOU GET THE PICTURE.OUR CHILDREN HAVE TO LEARN TO DEAL W/ NEGATIVE EMOTIONS AND UNDERSTAND THAT VIOLENCE IS NOT THE WAY. NOT TO MENTION PEOPLE WILL TALK ABOUT YOU UNTIL THE DAY YOU DIE. I LOOK AT IT LIKE THIS. YOU HAVE TO BE A REALLY IMPORTANT PERSON IF SOMEONE TAKES TIME OUT OF THEIR DAY TO STAND AROUND AND TALK ABOUT YOU. HOPE THIS HELPS