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7yr son and behaviour problems

Hi my son is 7yrs old. if he gets food down his clothes or just slightly gets them wet he has to change them, when eating his meals he has to have a specific plate or cup several lots of cutlery. he wants not what we cook always something different, will throw food in bin if we sit near him, constantly screams and shouts never wants to go to bed. Is constantly fighting his siblings. has speech problems and cannot recongnised letters and cannot read and write. Is it a condition or is will he grow out of it. He looks normal but sometime at school he dribbles and rolls his head back. could it be eplipesy or austim or something. getting desperate.