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Toilet training for my 4.5 yr old son

My son, who has recently started in reception class
is fearful of using the toilet to do a bowel movement.
I have tried all sorts of non confrontational approaches and rewards to encourage him to use the toilet.
I have also been to the GP and she couldn't offer any help.
Basically he still uses a nappy to do a poo in, which is now getting stressful and I really need help in helping him to use the toilet without fear.
If I refuse to let him have a nappy on, he will hold on and not do a poo for about 4 days.
He is very wilful!
Any suggestions or signposting would be appreciated.
Thank you.

Re: Toilet training for my 4.5 yr old son


I sympathise! My son will be five next month and we had exactly the same problem last year. He finally did a poo on the potty about a week before his fourth birthday. I too tried everything, but being a wilful little so and so, the only thing that really worked was bribery of sorts. He got a sparkly Dora sticker to stick on the potty for every poo he did in it, and the promise of a Spiderman toy if he did all his poos for a week on it! Als o the fact that his younger brother who wasn't yet two was showiing an interest in the potty spurred him on.....he didn't like the idea that baby brother was going to be a big boy before him!
Toilet training seems to be so easy with some kids and others, for whatever reason, have a tough time of it. He's still not dry at night, by the way, but we are persevering with the 'no nappies for big boys' and there is absolutely no pressure. We just accept that some nights we get woken up by cries of 'Mummy! I've done a wee!' and get on with life :) Lots of prasie for success and justtake accidents in your stride is the best policy, I think.

Good luck!

Amanda xxx