I am a educator and for 5 years I have utterly loved what I do and the responsability that comes along with it. It is a learning process and I learn everyday. I work for my 6th graders and my question/comment is as such; one of my girl`s has very poor social skills, by this I mean she teases, she bullies, she interfers, she manipulates...she pretty much causes problems wherever she goes and everyday I have a different girl or boy reporting to me that "this girl" has done this and done that and said this and said that. I deal with the situations the best way I can by mediating the parties involved although this seems to not be good enough mostly because she refuses to take responsability for any of her negative actions and almost always redirects the blame on others around her even when I have flat out seen the whole incident in it`s entirety, then "this girl" retreats to an isolated corner to sulk. Needless to say that "this girl" creates problems wherever she goes with every other child that she comes in contact with including the boys. I guess my question/comment is this; why do these children, the same ones that "this girl" purposely annoy everyday, continue to associate and play with "this girl" regardless of her anti-social antics? Literally 30 minutes later the "voices of complaint" have returned back to the scene of the crime as if nothing had happened. It`s almost as if they take it and choose to come back for more everyday rather than remove themselves from her poisonous behaviour. What is the logical explanation for this? Thank you for taking the time to respond...Steve!
Just a thought- but it sounds like this girl is seen as the "naughty" member of the class.... so everything she does is reported to you...... If they see her as the naughty one, then they aren;t the naughty ones.... it feels better and makes the others feel in the "in" crowd.
I observed a boy in my daughter's class when she was in primary school. He was considered as "the naughty boy" of the class. He was very able. He got told off a lot (for pulling my daughter's chair away once) and he was sent to the head etc when tiny. He really was labelled the "naughty child". I watched the teacher (I helped out)... evrytime he wriggled, flicked pages in the book "XXXXXXX please sit still, how many times do I have to tell you.... put your pencil down...." etc.
He was then diagnosed with aspergers and the teachers treated him differently. Much of his odd behaviour was ignored (and the rest of the class' attention not brought to it). Different strategies were used by the teachers (and as a teacher myself... they did really well......I don't know how they ignored some of his silly noises). When the children sat on the carpet, he sat at the back and if he wandered around, no-one saw. Within a year, my daughter no longer saw him as a naughty boy but as a child who was good funny . It's amazing how theteacher's attitude changed everything!!!
