Hi
Basically he is a 5 year old and when i tell him to do something he wont do it or claim to forget. One major problem is that he wont go to toilet until we ask him if he wants to wee..

Tonight i heard him get up and turn on the lights outside his room and when i went and asked him if he wants to go toilet he got up but although he was awake and wet his underwear he didnt go toilet. I asked him why he went to turn on the light (switch is right next to toilet) and didnt go toilet and he said I wanted to (switch on the light) but i dont know (why i didnt go toilet) and i asked him if i hadnt come would you have weed in bed and he said yes!

Yesterday just before going toilet i said clean yourself properly as sometimes wee goes on his underwear if he doesnt clean himself properly.

I am not sure on how to deal with it.. as everytime he does this i scold him and put him in his room and then afterwards i ask him if he will do it again and he says NO but he just does it again and when i ask him why he didnt do this he always says "i dont know"!! and i am getting very mad because he isnt listening!!

I would say you are being to harsh. You need to ignore the bad behaviour and praise up the good behaviour. When he has wet you need to say nothing and clean him up. Also when he in bed how about leaving a light on in toilet or hall way so he can see. He still is very young and still at the learning stage.

Hope this helps.

thanks for that.

My problem is that i cant seem to accept the fact that he answers with "i dont know" i mean i cant seem to grasp the fact that at night he went to switch on the light (right next to toilet) but he didnt go in.

Other is When he goes to wee and i or someone is not there with him, he doesnt clean himself properly and whne i ask him why not he said i dont know and if i ask him if he knew he had to he says "yes i knew"!

sorry if i am being stubborn or arrogant but i do want some help if at all possible..

I agree with Ang. You may want to put more attention on what you want, rather than what you don't want. Also, as you are being non-reactive to his "accidents," have him do as much of the clean up as he can, with your supervision.

Experiencing the natural consequences of him having more work to do than he would if he just went to the bathroom may turn this behavior around pretty quick.

check out some free behavior support http://focusedgood.blogspot.com/