My son aged 4 years 8 months started in 1st year juniors today. His teacher said he had a good day but she has already clocked that he has poor pencil control - this has been said right the way through nursery and preschool - what can I do to help, we practice with activity books and things to help improve fine motor skills but he is just not interested. I don't want to force him as I think things should take their natural course but the school is v results focused and this teacher has a rep for segregating kids that are slow.
Anyone with similar probs or have older kids who have survived? Any advice appreciated

I think your natural instinct to let nature take its course is perfect. But how worrying when the school is so 'results' oriented. My organisation has produced an emotional literacy for schools to help with this superficial approach. However, if you trust your child to be his best self then pencil control or not, they will flourish I promise you. Helping parents with child problems is very much my thing. After one day at school, the first day, so crucial to their happiness, I think you have all done great, protect and love him, do not push him. If you want my free articles etc about child problems and the power of parents to help them please email david@childproblem.co.uk and you will be sent them. I also have a newsletter about children and 'results'

Take care
David

Do let nature take its course; however, seek out advice from a doctor just to ensure that your child does not have a minor medical problem - and this can be anything from bone and cartlidge problems to very mild (not I said very mild) brain damage - which many of us have and do not realise - which can also be rectified simply through time and growth. Does you child undertake any activities that may cause sore hands? As a teacher I do not believe that using a pencil is nearly as important as it was years ago - that is prior to computers - let's face it most people rarely write at work, most use a computer. Get your child interested in painting at home - use butcher's paper and cheap water base paints - begin with finger painting and explain that only big boys and girls are allowed to use brushes - while allowing older children and yourself to sit nearby using a brush. Create in the child a desire to be considered old enough to use the brush as well. Having established that the child WANTS to use the brush - allow it; then stand back and observe any problems with holding the brush as the painting work is undertaken. Feel free to give advice and physically help to see exactly where the problems are - but make it fun and give lots of praise for the work created - do not comment on the inability to hold the brush.
Finally - DO NOT WORRY - pencil control is only a milestone. Each of us are individuals and progress at our own rate. The child may simply prefer to use his brain then his brawn - in this day and age that is perfectly acceptable. Teachers can be so anal some times.

Hi
Just thought that maybe something as simple as which hand he is using could solve part of the problem. We all have kids who copy - maybe he is using the wrong hand for writing cause he thinks that this is the 'right' hand to use. Something so simple yet it has not been mentioned - even by the so called teacher who does not believe that using a pencil is as important as it used to be. Of course it is important - not everyone will have access to a computer in later life, especially if they cannot write down the answers in an exam situation and subsequently fail all their exams - no certificates, no job, no money, no computer. OF COURSE IT IS IMPORTANT!!! What I also think is appauling is that the same person mentioned "to very mild (not I said very mild) brain damage" - I mean is that a typing error or what - I cannot believe that you were so tactless as to type that in the first place and even more so that you did not read it back and think about how it was going to be taken. It does not come out the way I hope you intended - almost the opposite in fact. I am really mad to think that children can be labelled even subconciously by teachers who can and might even think that they have some sort of brain damage because they can't write!!! Bit dramatic don't you think?
To the mum - sorry I can't look back for your name - don't worry, we all do and will continue to worry till they are well grown. Try him using his other hand - he may be more comfortable. Reassure him and as was also suggested, get him practicing without him being aware using paints and fun stuff - try lego or playdo for co-ordination and control, simple threading wool thru a plastic hole - maybe a pile of buttons - all just to encourage concentration and control - it will come - he is only wee! and very young. Hope this and the other helpful advice helps - remember some people are better at some things than others but all will shine in their own way.
Fiona
PS - I'm not a classroom teacher but I've been a 'hands on' childminder for 8 years and maybe have a more realistic and helpful response to your concern.