If you dont spank your son, then why doesnt your mom copy the same discipline method that you use at home?
Im going to say it yet again. I borrowed some videos from my sons school on encouraging good behavior/managing difficult behavior in kids called 1-2-3 Magic by Dr Thomas W. Phelan his teacher used the teachers version of it and now the entire school is using the method, so obviously its a good one. Spank-Free! Mabey you and your mom could implement it and get on the same page. Its easy to do and duplicate.
I am not keen on smacking as a punishment at all and would be absolutely furious if anyone did this to my children.
I think you need to lay down some ground rules with your mum and if she does not accept that you don't want your children smacked then I would look at other care arrangements. You need to feel comfortable about leaving your child.
I would educate her about time out as a method of discipline. There is a great book called discipline without shouting or spanking so maybe you could locate this book and give it to your mum to read.
Perphaps your mother has learned something in her aging years. From what you said, and the way you phrase it, you needed a couple of spankings you didn't get. A childs grandparents have far more experience in what works, not just "I feel" like most new parents. Don't try and worry that your kids won't "like you", just be a parent...like your mother.
I posted a message on this website looking for suggestions on how to address this with my mom - not looking for justification for her doing this. Under no circumstances is it acceptable for anyone to strike my children. There are plenty of other disciplinary actions to use and which to this day have worked with both of my children. Therefore, thank you "rosepeddle" for your useless reply - the fact that you even suggested I missed out on a few growing up leads me to believe that any child left in your care is probably not a very happy child! And you really think they still like you after you beat them day in and day out....what fantasy world are you living in????!!!!! My children love me because I talk to them and I rationalize with them. I know why they act out and together we find the appropriate solution. Yes, my children don't like me when they are punished but they soon get over it and we move on.
