My (almost) 13 year old son would like to have a girlfriend. I am unsure if he is old enough yet to have a one-to-one relationship, even if only platonic.
At the same time I do not want to restrict him too much either.
Any advice welcome.

Hi Vincent,

I guess its a case of you know your son best. I think the important thing to find out is why he wants a girlfriend, and what he feels having a girlfriend will give him that he doesn't have. My ten year old asked me recently if he was old enough for a girlfriend (yes i know, ten is young LOL) I asked him that very question, and he said he felt like he wanted companionship, and that he felt like he didnt have a special friend who understood him.

So, we chatted about how a girlfriend might not bring that either, that many kids have bfs/gfs just for a laugh, or to tell others that they have kissed or done other things, to get some street cred, and he might get hurt if someone used him in that way. After a lot of thinking, he decided he wasn't really looking for a girlfriend, and decided to try and find some new friends who were more on his level that others he has.

It could be that your son wants a girl because its cool, and all his friends have girls, I suppose it depends on how you feel about that kind of motivation. Whatever his reasons though, I think the main thing is to encourage him to hold off getting into anything serious and giving his heart away at such a young age, if only because they need all their senses to concentrate on school!!

Its great that he comes to you and talks about these things, handling this sensitively will probably help him to keep doing this.

Sorry, I know I haven't really helped much I hope you find the right answer, let us know.

Liz x