Hy.just cant seem to get anywhere as far as discipline is concerned with my 8yr old dsaughter.meal times are srtill a traumatic experince ...too much talk and shouting at the table.She just isnt time conscius about school or any other activity. There is a set routine she has to follow though. kindly advise if i can get her to listen without going through too much drama and fracas for both of us!!!!

When my child doesn't listen I know that I have not been listening to him. He is probably too restricted and controlled. After I was introduced to more gentle parenting ways, my boys changed from difficult monsters to kind and loving and cooperative kids. I read books like Unconditional Parenting, Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves, Kids are worth it, and Your comptent child, to name a few.

The main think I leanred is to stop controlling them and to stop telling them what to do. I learned to listen and respect. This brings so much peace. I hope you find your way toward peace with your daughter. Just know that it is always you, not her. As long as I tried to fix my boys, it was getting worse. When I fixed me, peace came to us.

Hy!! thanks for frank and sincere advice. You are so right about that controlling issue...kids are kids after all....God Bless ya

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Replying to:

When my child doesn't listen I know that I have not been listening to him. He is probably too restricted and controlled. After I was introduced to more gentle parenting ways, my boys changed from difficult monsters to kind and loving and cooperative kids. I read books like Unconditional Parenting, Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves, Kids are worth it, and Your comptent child, to name a few.

The main think I leanred is to stop controlling them and to stop telling them what to do. I learned to listen and respect. This brings so much peace. I hope you find your way toward peace with your daughter. Just know that it is always you, not her. As long as I tried to fix my boys, it was getting worse. When I fixed me, peace came to us.

Hi Im going through a similar thing with my 7 year old daughter (she'll be 8 this sept). I stopped certain actiities like gymnastics which didnt really help but mostly I changed the way my husband and I reacted when we knew she was lieing. It has only been silly little lies but I wanted to nip it in the bud before anything big happened. When we found out she'd told a silly lie we make her apologies for telling it to whichever one of us she lied to.Myself and my husband nolonger get angry at her when we know she's lieing and have stopped the threats ie: if we find out you've lied such and such will happen, now when we approach her about something we ask her to think very carefully before she answers and when she answers honestly we thank her for it and if she has done something wrong then we explain why its wrong and then forget about it and move on.We also explain that she's still a child and has alot of learning to do and that sometimes she will get things wrong but that she must always tell the truth and own up to things.By not getting angry with her she's more willing to be honest with us we've also said that she has to work towards doing the things she enjoys like gymnastics and going on the computer. It seems to be going well and Ive proved to her that Im on her side and I wont get angry with her for making honest mistakes (which it mostly is), most of all we deal with the issue, explain it and then move on and dont mention it agian. Hope some of this helps your situation.

Hy. Thanks for the advice..i definately m taking it... ..and i appreciate your frankness. God Bless you.

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Replying to:

Hi Im going through a similar thing with my 7 year old daughter (she'll be 8 this sept). I stopped certain actiities like gymnastics which didnt really help but mostly I changed the way my husband and I reacted when we knew she was lieing. It has only been silly little lies but I wanted to nip it in the bud before anything big happened. When we found out she'd told a silly lie we make her apologies for telling it to whichever one of us she lied to.Myself and my husband nolonger get angry at her when we know she's lieing and have stopped the threats ie: if we find out you've lied such and such will happen, now when we approach her about something we ask her to think very carefully before she answers and when she answers honestly we thank her for it and if she has done something wrong then we explain why its wrong and then forget about it and move on.We also explain that she's still a child and has alot of learning to do and that sometimes she will get things wrong but that she must always tell the truth and own up to things.By not getting angry with her she's more willing to be honest with us we've also said that she has to work towards doing the things she enjoys like gymnastics and going on the computer. It seems to be going well and Ive proved to her that Im on her side and I wont get angry with her for making honest mistakes (which it mostly is), most of all we deal with the issue, explain it and then move on and dont mention it agian. Hope some of this helps your situation.